


Pork & Beans

by JehBeeEh



Series: Ahead by a Century [44]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: AKA my last grocery trip, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, M/M, May be based on true events, Tony Stark Does What He Wants, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-03-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:22:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23273161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JehBeeEh/pseuds/JehBeeEh
Summary: SR: Hey! If I send you a list, can you stop at the store, please? Need a few things for the weekend and my meeting got pushed.TS: Yeah, totally!SR: Thanks babe! Love you xoxo
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Series: Ahead by a Century [44]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1514069
Comments: 20
Kudos: 183





	Pork & Beans

**SR:** Hey! If I send you a list, can you stop at the store, please? Need a few things for the weekend and my meeting got pushed.

 **TS:** Yeah, totally!

 **SR:** Thanks babe! Love you xoxo

* * *

Steve walked in the house and immediately regretted asking Tony to go to the store. There were bags trailing from the entrance way to the kitchen – thankfully half of them were the reusable ones he had insisted Happy keep in the car for emergencies. He peeked in one of the bags still by the front door and saw three boxes of cereal, none of which he ate or remembered ever seeing at the Penthouse before. He toed off his shoes and grabbed a few of the bags as he walked in, noticing none of the items he had actually asked for amongst the items he was now carrying. He tried to wrap his brain around how a list with a dozen or so items had turned into a house full of groceries when he reached the kitchen to find every cupboard and drawer open. His arms fell to his sides, as he failed to comprehend what he was looking at. He stepped over more bags – why was there so much food?! – before finding an empty spot to drop the load he'd moved into the chaos that was the kitchen, noticing that a certain genius husband of his was quite noticeably MIA from the scene.

“FRIDAY? Where is my husband?” he asked the AI, trying not to sound too annoyed.

“Boss is in the workshop, currently looking at blueprints for the kitchen design,” she replied, sounding much too human as always.

Steve gave the bags a quick once over, making sure nothing needed to be refrigerated or frozen, tripping on bags left, right and center. He headed towards the basement, plastering his kindest smile on his face before opening the door, already worried by what he was seeing.

“Hi sweetheart,” he said much too sweetly. “Been home long?”

“Got back an hour or so ago?” Tony answered absentmindedly, not looking away from the 3D render of their kitchen floating in front of him as he moved stacks of drawers around. Or, at least, what he assumed was their kitchen.

“What are you working on?” Steve crossed his arms over his chest, keeping the smile in place, trying not to get mad before he knew what the heck had happened.

“I was putting away food and realized the design of the kitchen is so impractical. We don’t have enough cupboard space, so I thought, maybe we can reorganize a bit and fit a pantry in here somewhere.” Tony was still not looking at him, answering in that tone he got when he was deep in some sciencey binge Steve barely understood, talking as if Steve was one of his AIs asking a question, not an actual human.

“We have more than enough space in the kitchen sweetheart, and we already have a pantry. Never been a problem before…” _today_ , Steve didn’t add. He knew his own tone was starting to be short, but this truly was ridiculous. “How about you come upstairs and show me what the problem is, huh?”

At that, Tony seemed to snap out of his laser focus on the hologram and slowly turned towards Steve. “So, I can explain.”

“I’m sure you can.” Steve’s fake smile had softened at the sight of Tony's sheepish look.

“I’m sorry,” the brunette supplied as he got up. He quickly walked towards Steve, wrapping his arms around the blonde's waist. “I think it is fair to assume I cannot be trusted at the store.”

“You don’t say?! I was _not_ expecting that statement at all!” Steve replied, his true smile making the words sarcastic and sweet instead of the biting remark they could have been. He coaxed his husband upstairs, Tony feeling obvious remorse for the whole ordeal, wincing audibly as he took stock of the mess of bags and items littering the kitchen. “So, wanna start at the beginning?” Steve asked sitting down at the island counter, grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl, acting like this was a regular Thursday conversation.

“Well, I got your list, and it was a really good list, by the way. I added a couple of things ‘cause I realized I was out of snacks in the workshop, you see…” Tony recounted, looking guiltier by the second. “And then, Happy dropped me off at the store – he made sure I brought in the reusable bags, by the way -"

“I saw. I’ll send him my warmest regards,” Steve answered, his voice almost too neutral for the conversation they were having, before taking another bite of his apple.

“Cute, Mr. Rose. Anyways, I used your list, and I bought everything on it too, it is all nicely put away. I wandered a bit though cause they re-organized the store and I couldn't find the damned tomato paste, and then I walked into the baking aisle, and saw they had cake mixes I hadn’t seen before, so I grabbed a few of those…”

“I saw the bag, there's one of every flavour.”

“Yeah… so… a few… then when I got near the frozen section, they had samples of these egg bite things, kinda like the ones you made me try that one time, but these were frozen!”

“You mean, the ones I make every Sunday with the pressure cooker, so I have quick breakfasts for the week? And the reason I asked for extra eggs?” Steve asked, another loud crunch coming from the apple.

“Yeah… got a couple boxes of those,” Tony answered quietly. “They have lots of samples at the store.”

“I know.” _Crunch_

“I might have gotten one or two of everything…” Tony looked at the counter, then up at Steve through his dark lashes, knowing he was playing dirty, but so unsure of Steve's reaction. The blond was just too calm.

“Is that why there is enough cereal to feed a hockey team in that bag there?” _Crunch_

“No… no. That was not fully my fault. Got lost while trying to find the chip aisle for those Doritos you like, and ended up in the cereal aisle instead, and this cute little guy kept going on and on about how Count Choculas were the best, and I’d never tried them, so I thought I’d grab a box. But his sister insisted Lucky Charms were the way to go, so I picked that up to. And then the bunny on the box of Trix was just too cute to pass up.”

“Have you never learned, Trix are for kids?”

“I’m a grown ass man and will buy whatever cereal I damn well please!”

“The best, by far, are Cinnamon Toast Crunch, by the way.”

“Nu-uh! Froot Loops are way better!”

“And yet, you didn’t get those.” _Crunch_

“Touché.”

They stared at each other for a minute, Tony looking apologetic, Steve remaining serious, but slowly becoming more and more amused. They both smiled and started laughing, Steve speaking first as they quieted.

“Tony I love you, really, I - so so much – truly. But why?!” He sounded slightly exasperated but couldn’t help the fondness seeping into the words as well.

“I felt bad when I stopped and tried samples and then didn’t buy them! And you should have seen those little siblings arguing their points for their favourite cereals, Steve! Both of them, future debate club leaders right there.”

“And the poptarts?”

“I was hungry when I went to the store, I was thinking they’d make a good snack…”

Steve held his arms open towards his husband, the genius making his way around the island, through the maze of bags, before collapsing into Steve's hold.

“I’m banned from grocery shopping, huh?” Tony mumbled into Steve's neck.

“Not exactly, but we will need to make sure you eat before going to the store. And practice saying no to samples.”

“That’s fair.”

“Well, I know you are full of grocery store samples, but I need dinner,” Steve announced as his stomach decided to make it known an apple was not enough to sustain him. “We can parse through all you bought after that and make a box to donate? Cause there is no way in hell we can eat all this!”

“Sounds like a plan. I’m actually hungry too. Wanna get take-out?”

Steve pulled away from Tony, looking incredulous.

“What?!” the brunette answered.

Steve's eyes widened as he gestured wildly at all the bags around them. “We have more than enough food! No take-out!”

“Fine, fine…” Tony answered, lifting his hands up in defeat as Steve made his way to the fridge, pulling open the freezer drawer.

“Beef and Broccoli sound good?” Steve asked, not waiting for an answer before pulling the bag of frozen veggies from the drawer, noticing a box of Cinnamon Eggos underneath. “You found some?” he asked, his smile softening again as he remembered the one time he’d mentioned them to Tony, stunned that he remembered.

“Yeah, they had them, and I know you said they’re hard to find, so I thought I’d grab some for you. I’m sorry. Can we donate frozen foods?”

Steve quirked an eyebrow at the genius before answering with a smirk, “Hey! Le'go my Eggos, Stark.”

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah... I may have gone to do a grocery for 'essentials' on Friday, and then saw they'd restocked the whole store (it was bare a week ago when I went) and bought way too much stuff... It translated into this. #sorrynotsorry
> 
> Happy Sunday, friends!


End file.
